My godmother told me once that she knew her relationship was over (she had been dating someone for several years after she got a divorce) when she couldn't stand the sight of him chewing. She said she wanted to just knock him upside the head ... for chewing his food. I always thought that was a nutty thing to say until I dated a guy a couple of years ago who annoyed the shit out of me every time he laughed. His mouth was just open way too wide, and it was never that funny. I figured out pretty quickly what my godmother meant about chewing, so I can damn sure understand how you must've felt in such an intimate moment. If you're just staring at the mirror like it's someone else having sex, not you, it sounds like an out-of-body experience. As in, you wanted to get your BODY out of that EXPERIENCE.

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