Mixed opinions on this one. In the case of this show, the couple that was arguing and fighting have both cheated on each other repeatedly so the insecurities are there. Now as far as being inappropriate or hitting on someone, I’m of the mindset that if you don’t do it in front of me, then I am fine with blissful ignorance. (No sex though. No dating. No cheating.) But if you’re just out of order right in my face, we have a fucking issue. I recall a guy I was dating turning to size up a woman right in front of me — twice. Once it was a lady walking by the lakefront and another time it was a waitress. I had to seriously check myself to not get mad at the women and direct my energy toward them. The waitress was being oddly bitchy to the point where I wondered did they know each other, but the woman walking down the street was just minding her business and being cute.

I just told the guy, “Listen, if you feel like it’s cool to just check out women right in front of me like we’re buddies, then we need to be buddies.” He went all off into a tangent about me being “too nice” to a handyman who’d just fixed my plumbing, and it turned into tit-for-tat. Keep in mind, I was already super cool with this plumber years before. But I realized two things: If you’re insecure in the relationship from the beginning, it never gets better. And if you’re keeping tabs so you can flirt to “get even” that’s childish as hell. I walked away a month or two later and never circled back. I have a father already; I’m done explaining myself to grown men.

Check out her six Medium pubs: BlackTechLogy, Doggone World, Homegrown, I Do See Color, Tickled and We Need to Talk. Visit Shamontiel.com to read about her.

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