I gotta be honest here. I’m still rocking with your side. Let’s say you didn’t lose a breast or a friend and cancer was nonexistent. I just feel a way about someone asking you to only celebrate THEIR birthday if you two share the same birthday. I had a Girl Scout leader who had the same birthday as me. To this day, I know that our mutual friend is going to send cards and money (always whatever age we are) to us. And if we’re together, it’ll always be a group celebration.

This reminds me of an episode of “Braxton Family Values” with Tamar Braxton refusing to acknowledge her sister’s birthday the same week. Tamar wanted a family vacation and didn’t even want the cake to say anything about Traci. She scowled when Traci’s husband wished Traci a Happy Birthday at the table. Traci Braxton let it go and just submitted to Tamar’s antics. And Tamar went ballistic when another sister (Trina) got engaged during the weekend of the family vacation — not the birthday, just the weekend of it. In her mind, her birthday was more important than everything going on in everyone’s life. She babbled about it all on Instagram and told the public her sister was engaged before her sister even could share the good news. As grown-ups, that s — t is so corny to me. When I’m turning Sweet 16 or Next Call for Alcohol 21, I get it. But after the age of 21, it should never be this deep.

The only way I can see this making sense is if one person chipped in more on the party two years ago than the other. Then I could see you two going, “Nope, I’d rather do this myself.” But why ask on a group text WITH THE PERSON WHOSE BIRTHDAY YOU SHARE to only celebrate your own? Nope, that’s very Tamar-ish to me. You were not wrong.

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Check out her five Medium publications: Doggone World, Homegrown, I Do See Color, Tickled and We Need to Talk. Visit Shamontiel.com to read about her.

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