I did this in another way. I wrote about it on Medium awhile ago: “Write your photo memories down ~ When photos are lost but journal memories stick around

Long story short, I was looking for a particular calendar date for a project and ended up going down the rabbit hole of reading old journals from my 20s. And I kept seeing myself fall for the same guy over and over and over again. It was like I never learned the lesson. After that, I kept opening journals and reading up until today, and I realized I have gotten better, but I still keep falling for the same stupidity.

I would change phone numbers, block folks on social media and delete email addresses, only to date the same guy in a different body. In the spring of last year, I finally just said, “Oh my gawd, I’m too old for this.” Now I have absolutes that really should have gone into play in my early 30s. (However, I was so smitten with this childhood crush of five years that I kinda burned through some time.)

Marriage has never been of interest to me. If I do it, I do it. But if I don’t, I honestly can’t even attempt to act like I care. Dating/relationships aren’t on my top 10 list of priorities right now. Maybe that’s a good thing because I’m not nearly as focused as I was during my online dating spree a couple of years ago. I believe the saying goes that once you stop looking, you find it. But with the four-month coronavirus outbreak, I want everybody to stay as far away from me as possible. Ha, ha, ha. And I mean that sincerely.

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Check out her five Medium publications: Doggone World, Homegrown, I Do See Color, Tickled and We Need to Talk. Visit Shamontiel.com to read about her.

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